


and if it's quite alright, I need you baby

by chiyoris



Category: NU'EST
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Slice of Life, and aged down some of them, coffee shop AU, don't h8 me pls, just an fyi, self indulgent, semi college au, so I aged some of them up, um nobody dies in this one at least
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:00:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24192469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chiyoris/pseuds/chiyoris
Summary: He had one of those smiles, the kind that looked like a laugh because his whole body responded in joy and the energy that surrounded him was pure happiness. Needless to say, it was adorable.
Relationships: And also - Relationship, Choi Minki | Ren/Hwang Minhyun, Hwang Minhyun/Kim Jonghyun | JR, Kang Dongho | Baekho/Kim Jonghyun | JR, Kim Jonghyun | JR/Aaron Kwak | Aron, and - Relationship, as besties too, as cute besties, with a little bit of - Relationship
Comments: 8
Kudos: 37





	and if it's quite alright, I need you baby

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So, well, what started as a practice drabble so that I could work on my characterization and attention to detail turned into this crazy monster so uh....enjoy!
> 
> [ inspo ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcJm1pOswfM)

Jonghyun has a routine, a second by second planned life schedule that he wished to adhere to from the day he started his life as a free and independent adult to the day he was lying on his deathbed in his old age. A strict policy with no bullshit excuses nor any pointless distractions.

He was put on this earth to simply live out his life like a normal human being, work like a normal human being, and hopefully die like one too. This was his ultimate end goal; his entire life was leading up to the moment he could sit down and tell his four cats how he lived a normal and simple life. How he managed to live steering clear of all spontaneity and happiness, he lived simply to be given the opportunity to boast about how he managed to live the most boring life possible. It was a solid, foolproof plan.

He’d manage to live the past twenty-five years as such, without any problems arising. It was a wonderfully dull life. No abnormality, no room for surprises.

It was perfect.

Until, of course, chaos came in the form of Hwang Minhyun. In all his bleached hair, torn jeans, and stupid bright smile glory.

A small handwritten note from Kim Jonghyun to the universe, eye smiles, and giggles don’t deserve to exist at eight in the morning. Not when he was struggling to stay awake while having to deal with disgruntled office workers hurrying him to make their coffee as they were already running late to whatever dull desk awaited them. Really, why did Jonghyun care that their children woke up with a fever or that they slept through all five of their alarm clocks? Jonghyun just wanted to serve coffee, make money, and go home to eat the leftovers his roommate Dongho left behind (a perk of living with a line cook: there was always food on Jonghyun’s table.) But here he was listening to a middle-aged woman complain about her husband’s snoring resulting in her staying up until three in the morning trying to plug his nose with cotton balls. Jonghyun doesn’t bother telling her that plugging someone’s nose while they sleep doesn’t keep them from snoring. If anything, it probably increases their likelihood to die while gasping for air. So perhaps the woman had a homicidal way of fixing things, who was he to judge? He did, however, make sure to laugh at the designated moments and agree with a smile on his face whenever the woman looked at him expectantly. Hey, he had to earn those tips one way or another. Inconspicuously, he pushes the tip jar in the woman’s direction before releasing another hearty laugh at her attempt to slander her husband’s disruptive sleep pattern even more. The five-dollar bill she drops into the glass jar makes the forced ass kissing worth it and Jonghyun plasters another customer-friendly smile as he greets the next customer. Mm, a grumpy old guy who orders a plain black coffee and a bagel with butter. Boring. Plain. And was also Jonghyun’s favorite.

When the hour hand strikes eight, the cafe is mostly cleared of the frenzied office workers and the new incoming traffic involves the stressed appearances of college students. Before Jonghyun could even stop to rest his feet, he’s back at the register - a customer-friendly grin back on his face. He doesn’t make as much of an effort to keep up with the conversation, however. College students are less keen on giving service workers good tips, he’s learned from experience. Thus, with this mindset, he keeps a polite smile on as he serves the students who barely lift their head or breathe a sign of acknowledgment. This was a routine he was used to, a routine he had perfected, he was used to this, and rarely were there any strange occurrences that disrupted it. By now, all strange events were most likely a direct result of Jonghyun’s coworker Aron, who had an obsession with becoming the disorder in Jonghyun’s, otherwise, orderly life. And by now, Jonghyun had calculated Aron’s ingenuity to fit in with his plans so that it wasn’t a nuisance but rather a small quirk Jonghyun was willing to bend to.

Of course, as plans go, Aron was in the backroom decorating their pastries while belting the lyrics to the song playing through the speakers of their cafe’s jukebox, The Four Seasons’ Can’t take my eyes off you. Jonghyun’s song choice, a great decision, if he did say so himself. At least he initially believed it to be. He was beginning to regret it when he noticed amused glances being thrown towards their kitchen.

He sighs when Aron belts out the chorus “I LOVE YOU BABY AND IF IT’S QUITE ALRIGHT I NEED YOU BABY TO WARM THE LONELY NIGHTS I LOVE YOU BABY TRUST IN ME WHEN I-”

The singing is interrupted when Jonghyun hears the other reduced to a coughing fit. He shakes his head, a smile grazing his face. The same old Aron. Amid his co-worker’s coughing fit, a figure shoves through the door pulling along with it another bundle of clothes. Jonghyun is in a moment’s shock when a tall guy with dyed pink hair pulled up into a man-bun stopped right in front of Jonghyun’s counter. Jonghyun doesn’t know how to react and he blinks a few times before recovering and pasting on his usual customer-friendly smile, he looks behind the tall figure and catches the oddest sight he had ever laid eyes on, his smile faltering a bit. A pretty man in tight leather pants with a flowy pastel shirt in the middle of a business district wasn’t something you see every day, but Jonghyun wasn’t going to let such a distinctive aspect of a person’s fashion ruin his habitually boring day. With this in mind, Jonghyun regained his composure and plastered the same smile on his face. The more excited of the two, dressed in an oversized yellow hoodie and grey joggers, enthusiastically orders a caramel frappuccino with extra caramel and an extra shot of espresso. Before Jonghyun can even ask for the other’s name to write on his cup, yellow hoodie says “Under Mingi, please!”.

He moves to the side as the other male shuffles forward, Jonghyun’s eyes glance over the man quickly. Briefly acknowledging said male’s pretty face and slender build, before reverting to his customer service smile, waiting for the said customer to place his order.

“Sold out house tonight, huh?” leather pants laughed, Jonghyun took note of how the other’s nose crinkled, and his eyes danced in mirth at his own joke. He also took note of how much he wanted to punch the other in the face.

“Oh yeah college students have quite the taste for mediocre talent.” He responded seriously, his eyebrows scrunching together when he saw the other double over in laughter. He glared at the other male, consciously deciding that he didn’t like the sound of the other’s laugh.

“I think he sounds great.” leather pants grins behind Jonghyun, his eyes curving into pretty moon crescents. Jonghyun wanted to physically assault his pretty face, but as a good customer service worker does, he kept his composure.

His friendly smile never leaves his face, “Now, what can I get for you?”

“Oh yeah, I’ll have a strawberry-banana smoothie please.” Leather pants smiled at him again, and Jonghyun wanted to end this interaction as quickly as possible because he was getting tired of the other’s pretty annoying smile.

“Name?”

“Minhyun. M-i-n-h-y-u-n” Jonghyun nodded and proceeded to write it as Minghun simply because he was feeling petty this morning. “Okay, that will be-”

“At long last love has arrived and I thank God I’m alive. You’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off you ~” Aron sidles up against Jonghyun’s side, and the older watches him look from leather pants Minhyun to Jonghyun and vice versa. His expression showcased a look of mischief, a look Jonghyun, unfortunately, knew all too well.

“$8.40 please” Jonghyun shoves his co-worker away from him and as he reaches out to grab the card from Minhyun’s outstretched hand, Aron (who suffers from a rare condition where he acts out whenever he feels likes he’s not receiving the attention he deserves) belted out the ending to what is now becoming Jonghyun’s increasingly least favorite 60’s classic.

“OH PRETTY BABY DON’T BRING ME DOWN I PRAY! OH, PRETTY BABY! NOW THAT I HAVE FOUND YOU STAY! OH PRETTY BABY TRUST IN ME WHEN I SAAAAAAAY”

Jonghyun’s face flushes red when in the shock of Aron’s falsetto, his hand accidentally brushed against Minhyun’s smaller, softer ones and he feels a slight shock run through his fingers. Unlike the romance paperback novels his mother used to indulge in and the stupid romance movies Dongho liked to watch on lonely Saturday nights, Jonghyun doesn’t feel light and jittery. Instead he pulls back his hand harshly, tries airing away the heat that’s been building up around him. He’s sweating from all areas in his body and his heart feels like he just ran a marathon, and he doesn’t like the way his hand’s twitching to brush past Minhyun’s, again. This isn’t normal, it’s far from boring and has completely ruined Jonghyun’s routine. He's decided that he’s beginning to like this Minhyun kid, increasingly less and less.

“Dude was really pretty, huh?” Aron leans against the counter as Jonghyun tries to clean up after the morning rush had died down and the cafe’s jukebox had played its fair share of good oldies music. Now the speakers are blaring the worst hits of the 20th century (again Jonghyun’s favorite genre of music, he was most definitely born in the wrong decade. Aron believes he’s actually 100 years old and possibly suffers from Benjamin Button syndrome.) Jonghyun glares at him as he swats him away with his dishrag, Aron’s obnoxious laughter ringing throughout the cafe.

Jonghyun looks over to the side window, where Minhyun and his yellow-hoodie friend, Mingi, had sat in one of the four-seaters. Minhyun is staring out the window, head-bopping to Brian Hyland’s Itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini (and yes, in case you were wondering the song is just as bad as the name, perhaps worse if Aron’s loud groan as he rushes to change it is any indicator.) While he watches the other, Jonghyun has the slightest thought of what could be on his mind. What could a strange man such as Minhyun even think about? What could possibly be on such an eccentric man’s mind? Why the hell did Jonghyun care anyway? He could care less about the weird guy with the weird clothes and the weird smile. He didn't care at all. Absolutely not.

Little did he know, however, that this was not the last time he’d see Hwang Minhyun.

Oh no, Hwang Minhyun was here to stay.

"What can I get for you today?"

The newly dyed blond hummed, his finger tapping against his chin, Jonghyun supposed deciding on which liquefied sugar drink to choose was a hard decision to make for the other. He waited patiently until the other smiled, the same annoyingly bright smile plastered on his just as annoyingly pretty face, "Surprise me."

Jonghyun wasn't one for surprises. Every move he made, every word he said was punctual, well thought out. Intentional.

If Jonghyun didn't have a plan of action along with a Plan B, C, and D - he didn't do it. In Jonghyun's world, there was never any room for surprises. Yet here Hwang Minhyun was, in all his exotic glory asking Jonghyun to do the absolutely impossible.

Be spontaneous and surprise him.

Jonghyun sighs after taking in the blond in all his excited ball of energy and decides to play along. For the sake of receiving a large tip and not for the sake of the pretty boy with the nice smile in front of him, "An Americano, it is then."

Minhyun's face scrunched up and his lips formed into a small pout, Jonghyun wanted to slap himself for finding it kind of cute. "Aren't those bitter?"

“Very,” Jonghyun sighs.

“What it’s in it?”

“Shot of espresso diluted with water.” Jonghyun’s deadpans.

“Gross,” Minhyun says, his face scrunches up in disgust.

“I hate coffee.”

“You came into a coffee shop,” Jonghyun looks at him as if the other boy had lost his mind, Minghyun laughs out loud.

“You’re right, but I’m not sure if that sounds good.” Minhyun’s pout returns and Jonghyun really just wants to slam his head into the espresso machine right next to him.

"You said to surprise you," Jonghyun replies, his annoyance lacing his words.

Minhyun does the unexpected (once again), and instead of getting angry at Jonghyun for being an obvious dick - he laughs. Jonghyun's heart pounds against his rib cage and his brain short-circuits. Minhyun - eyes bright, nose crinkled, and a smile as beautiful as ever - nodded. "Right! So, then add an extra shot of espresso in there."

"No." Jonghyun says, obviously finding the suggestion idiotic. He grabs a small cup from the side (in case Minhyun wants to throw it out, at least Jonghyun isn’t wasting product) and begins scribbling the other's name on it. M-u-n-h-y-u-n

"No?"

"I'm not trying to kill you, Minhyun. I would like to keep my shop open for a little while longer." When Jonghyun glances back up, the smile on the other's face was unbearable. But deep down, far deep down, Jonghyun quite liked the other's pretty smile, and he (though, he refused to admit it) looked forward to seeing it every day.

Minhyun takes his, now usual, spot at the four-seater table on the left side of the cafe. His blond head people-watching as they walked past the cafe in all their hurried steps, foot tapping to the beat of Aretha Franklin’s Respect. Jonghyun always wonders what it is that keeps Minhyun so preoccupied. To keep him in the same position as he took small sips from his cup every once and awhile and until Jonghyun was ready to close for the day. What was it that made Minhyun so intriguing to Jonghyun?

"Are you not the least bit curious about me?"

Jonghyun's head throbbed and he really just wanted to close the cafe quietly without any disturbances. However, the boy in the ripped faded blue jeans, red converse, and a black tee, with the bloody lettering of "MCR" dripping down the front of it, tucked nicely into his waistband seemed to have other plans for the poor barista. His new hair color is a strawberry pink, or so he claims. Jonghyun just thinks it would look horrible on anyone else but the strangely cute customer that came into the cafe every other day.

Jonghyun sighed, and he's begun to realize that he's sighing more often now that his entire world is crashing down around him. A keen observation on his part. Despite his incoming migraine, or perhaps due to it, he's begun to make dumb decisions and decides to indulge the other.

"What do you study, Minhyun?"

Minhyun beamed, his eyes dancing when the bright lights that hung from the ceiling reflected off the pupils. "Theater Arts and Music Composition."

Jonghyun, would usually care less about things like this but as usual his interest tended to pique whenever it came to the weird college student, he'd grown accustomed to seeing every day. "And what do you plan to do with that?"

Minhyun hums, a trace of a smirk forming on his lips when he notices that the older male had paused from cleaning the tables, dirty dishrag hung loosely from his hands. "No idea."

"How much money do you think you can make in a career with that degree?"

Minhyun, leaned back in his chair, perhaps contemplating that answer, "I'm not sure. But I'll be the greatest."

"How are you so sure, if you don’t even know what you want to be?"

"I have no idea." And there goes Minhyun's cat-like grin, gracing his pretty face once again.

Jonghyun soaks up the conversation and takes a moment to pause and think about that answer. He couldn't fathom the idea of someone not knowing what they were doing with their life let alone being completely oblivious to where they would end up in the end. How in the world did Minhyun even survive day to day with such a nonchalant attitude and yet manage to not have an existential crisis every five seconds?

When his attention zeroes in on the other, and he notices the light smile tracing the college student's lips, the way his body dances to the music playing from the jukebox, he realizes that Minhyun seemed content, if not completely satisfied, with the way his life is panning out at the moment. Satisfied with unknown mysteries of the future, if Jonghyun allowed himself to dwell on that thought even further he'd think Minhyun even welcomed the thrill of not knowing what the future or his destiny had in store for him. Jonghyun shuddered at that thought, in no way could he ever understand how that felt.

His musings are disrupted when he hears the scrape of the metal chair against their tiled floor. When he comes to full attention, he notices two things: the song on the jukebox had stopped playing and the silence that followed must have meant it was the last one on the playlist for the night. The second thing he notices is the awkward waddle of the college student as he stands up to throw his empty cup into the trashcan behind the counter (Jonghyun had long stopped caring to assure him he'd pick it up and throw it away for him - per cafe policy - and let his customer do as he pleased.) Jonghyun's eyes furrowed, noticing the other stall for a few seconds after reaching the trash can, trying to catch his breath. "You okay?" He calls out.

The other jumped, almost knocking over the trash can (which on other days would have pissed Jonghyun off, but his headache was coming back, and he didn't have the heart to scold the other for being a klutz.) "Yeah, yeah, yeah of course. Why wouldn't I be?" The other let out an awkward laugh, heading back to the front of the cafe, attempting to put a spring in his step which resulted in him stepping wrongly and he had to break his fall with the tables Jonghyun had already stacked. Having gotten used to Minhyun's eccentricities, Jonghyun sighed and went back to wiping the remaining tabletops. Whatever calm moment of human empathy that once surrounded them, was now gone.

"Are you sure you're okay?" his voice called out, not bothering to look back at the younger male.

"Yeah." came the other's breathless reply, and Jonghyun resisted the urge to laugh. Strange, he'd almost forgotten the feeling of genuine laughter. The way your stomach clenched, and the feeling of bubbling humor spread from the pit of your stomach up to your throat and out your mouth. God, he’s forgotten how much he hated the feeling. "I'm fine." another awkward cough, "I'll be leaving now."

Jonghyun nods and he watches as the other awkwardly shuffles to the door, trying to hide whatever limp the barista had pointed out.

Minhyun, Jonghyun thought, was an eccentric man in and of himself. But knowing more about the other, only made things stranger for the barista.

Jonghyun doesn’t see Minhyun for a while after that. Dongho logically claims the other male might be busy, Aron on the other hand, proposes he was abducted by aliens. Despite the reason, however, Jonghyun found himself feeling out of place in his daily routine. The first day he found solace in the thought that he would be able to return to his humdrum existence before Minhyun ever stepped a foot into his cafe. But, and Jonghyun hates to admit this, the younger male had left a deeper imprint on the older café owner’s life. He didn’t know how it happened but by the fourth day, he’d become so irritable that when Aron goofed around before they opened, Jonghyun snapped at him and told him to Get his shit together or leave.

Which, of course, was very un-Jonghyun like. He had never been the type to be irritated easily (Minhyun was the first to even get on his nerves.) When the look of uncontained joy fell off his coworker’s face and he immediately froze in the midst of his own rendition of I’m Your Girl by S.E.S., Jonghyun instantly regretted his statement.

He was on the verge of apologizing to his co-worker when the older of the two approached him and laid a gentle hand on his back, “Don’t sweat it, my dude,” Aron tells him seriously, “I know you miss your boyfriend.”

Jonghyun, despite the clenching in his stomach and the way his heart thumped in his chest, had enough sense to curl his left hand into a fist and threateningly swing towards Aron’s face. The other had even faster reflexes as he twirled himself out of harm’s way, blowing a raspberry in Jonghyun’s direction, laughing at the other trying to scare him with threats of beating his ass to a pulp.

A week later, Minhyun’s friend Mingi comes to the cafe looking for Aron because apparently Jonghyun’s coworker had bet him a free meal during one of their gaming seshes. Aron, who Jonghyun knew sucked at everything, very likely lost and was now in debt. And since the former wasn’t here, Jonghyun thought about turning the kid away, but he took one look at the boy’s pout and decided it was the grossest thing he’s ever seen. “Fine, what can I get you, Mingi?” the boy’s eyes lit up and Jonghyun felt awkward by how much the kid was staring at him. Hey, this shouldn’t be too bad, maybe some new company might do him some good. Ugh, he was starting to sound like Aron, when will his life stop spiraling out of control.

Mingi was the closest thing to anything Minhyun related that Jonghyun has been able to have in a while and who knows, he might enjoy the boy’s company. Might also be able to squeeze out some info on Minhyun but that was selfish and Jonghyun knew it, so he tried pushing that thought away.

“Hey Jonghyun,” the older hummed in response, placing the extra straws, napkins, and cup holders he’d retrieve from dry storage on the empty counter space next to Mingi.

“Why coffee?”

Jonghyun looked over at Mingi, it was summer and so the younger boy was dressed in an oversized tee with small gym shorts, he had on a red headband and looked bored while he stirred his iced mocha latte. The question was so abrupt that it threw Jonghyun a little off guard, he raised his eyebrows and asked, “I’m sorry?”

Minki stretched out his long limbs and yawned out loud, “Why did you decide to make coffee? Why did you open this shop? How long ago did you open this shop? How old are you?”

Not to be overly sensitive, but that last question stung a bit. Jonghyun let it slide as he wiped down and restocked his front counter. “Well,” He needed a moment to collect his thoughts to decide how much of himself he was willing to tell. He’s never liked talking about himself and the only person who probably knew anything about him would be Dongho. And maybe Aron but it’s not like he really told him anything personal willingly, it was more due to coercion if you asked him. But here he was, standing in the middle of his mostly empty shop early June, with an overgrown manchild dangling off one of his counter stools, giving away all his secrets. Well that probably sounded too dramatic, but you get the point.

“The easiest answer is to that last one, I’m twenty-five,” he said, “and not a day older, thank you.”

Mingi, for the first time that day, laughed boisterously. He managed to spill a couple of droplets from his latte onto the counter. Jonghyun, of course, didn't pay any mind. Whatsoever. He just hastily wiped down the spill along with the entire counter space around Mingi.

Once he’s done, he returns to his original task at hand and continues, “I went to culinary school first, actually.”

He heard a gasp that was followed by a giggle and then a, “Really?! That’s so...cool”

Jonghyun laughed, feeling his cheeks heat up, it was pretty cool but hearing someone feel so amazed by him was...new. Not bad. But new.

“So, you know how to cook?”

“Well yeah. I mean I already knew how to cook before, my mom actually taught me. And I, um, I always enjoyed cooking. But culinary school shows you more than just how to cook. It shows the art of cooking, the art of plating, the message and story you give each plate as you make it, the kind of experience you’re cultivating for the person who will eat your meal. The management of a kitchen, the organized chaos, and how each individual part plays a vital role in the creation of a meal.” Jonghyun looks over at Mingi, who actually looks intrigued by the stuff he was saying. What an interesting guy.

“Dope. So, why coffee?”

“Well ever since I was able to work, I’ve always worked at a restaurant. I started off as a seater, then a busser, worked my way into serving. But I always had this draw towards the kitchen. Obviously, I had a passion for it. But I was also drawn to how it worked, how these different portions of the line worked together to create one plate. One person grilled the meats, while another prepared the sauce, and then another plates the entire thing to be sent out. It was fascinating and I took the first opportunity that was presented to work as a line cook.”

“How was it?”

“I loved it,” Jonghyun has a faint smile on his face as he remembers the past, “the chaos of it all and how it all worked together so,” he took a pause, relished in the memories, “So perfectly.

I then went to work at many other kitchens even after,” he paused to think of the right words and settled with, “even after, I left my parents’ house. Once I was on my own, I had to think about how I was going to make money to take care of myself. It was difficult and stressful because moving away and starting on your own is really difficult. And I thought about going to school, but I just never had enough money for a university. I also didn’t want to spend so much money on a school when I didn’t even know what to do, you know?” Leaving his home unexpectedly t was the last semi-impulsive thing he's ever done, but he didn’t really have much of a choice. His parents didn’t really give him time to make himself a plan before they made him leave his childhood home. But somehow, he made it here and where he is, isn’t too bad. A pretty café in the middle of a business district and only a five-minute walk from an art institute down the street. He got to enjoy the business of office workers and college students (the perfect customers for coffee and free wifi), got to listen to his own playlist of favorite music every day, and also was blessed to do something he was genuinely passionate about. If he let himself relish in that fact, he doesn’t think he did too bad for himself. Not at all, actually.

“So then what happened?” Minki’s voice cuts through his thoughts and Jonghyun feels embarrassed because he doesn’t know how long he had been lost in his own thoughts. “Where did you go to culinary school? Is it cheaper than a regular university?”

Jonghyun laughs, “Not at all.I’m still paying off a big debt in student loans.” he turns serious and points at Mingi, “Don’t accept loans. Ever. Not worth it.”

Mingi laughs, “I have a scholarship.”

Jonghyun looks impressed, “Not bad, not bad at all. Where do you go?”

Mingi nods his head in the direction of the institute down the street, “AIS, me and Minhyun study Theater. Well, he’s a double major because he’s the biggest overachiever I know. But I’m Choi Mingi, theater geek, at your service.” he salutes Jonghyun and gives him a wink.

Jonghyun laughs, a genuine laugh, and continues, “Well, when I moved here, so many people I worked with, out here, all talked really big about AIS. How they wanted to go there and work towards getting certified in culinary arts.” Jonghyun shrugs, “Not really to appreciate the art form of culinary, but certifications always mean better pay and more opportunities. But I, on the contrary, applied to the culinary program because I wanted to become a chef. I wanted to own my very own fine-dining Korean infused restaurant where I created a new menu every night and work towards receiving a Michelin star.”

He laughs at Mingi’s facial expression, “We all have big dreams at one point, I just fell for the coziness of a coffee shop and the buzz of a restaurant. So, this is where I am, today.”

“That makes sense.”

“Does it?”

Mingi shrugs and finishes the rest of his latte, spilling more on Jonghyun’s counter. He’ll just clean it later, he decides. The self-proclaimed theatre geek was the last (and only) interesting thing to happen to Jonghyun for the rest of the day. He closes the shop and sighs as another day passes by without pretty boy Minhyun.

Minhyun returns a couple of weeks after (3 excruciatingly painful weeks and 2 horrifyingly insufferable days to be exact. But, hey, who’s counting right?) and orders a strawberry shake, his smile as bright as ever and to anyone else he could’ve fooled them with how happy he looked. Jonghyun, however, has the eyes of a hawk and the annoyingly persistent observing nature of a mother, and so notices the way the younger’s smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes and how he appeared more fidgety than normal. Jonghyun, when he hears the charm on the door jingle, calls out a welcome greeting - not thinking much of it. It’s a Saturday, early July, and Aron had taken off to hang out with some old friends from out of town. Jonghyun didn’t mind, it’s not like he had much to do on the weekends anyway.

“I’ll be with you in just a minute,” Jonghyun calls out, from behind their display case, he doesn’t get an answer which he shrugs off. We all have those days. He carefully places the cake pops Aron had prepared the day before inside the display case before standing up and walking towards the register. He swipes his card, humming along to the song the last customer picked out on the jukebox. My Girl by the Temptations, a classic, his foot taps along to the rhythm. He pastes his usual customer smile on his face and looks up, ready to take the customer’s order, and then his voice dies in his throat.

Standing in front of him in all grunge, high school angst looking grandeur, stood none other than Minhyun. The other was focused on reading the menu, though Jonghyun was sure he’d already remembered it by heart, he let the other keep on with whatever game he was playing. Instead, Jonghyun settled on observing the other. Observing the way, his lips formed the words his eyes read off the chalkboard hanging off the wall behind Jonghyun’s head, the way his fingers twitched against his inner forearm (perhaps a nervous tick Jonghyun never noticed before), he observed the way the other swayed back and forth towards the beat of Stand by Me, a random selection the jukebox made. Jonghyun notices the dark circles under the other’s eyes and the messier state than the usual bird’s nest his hair was always in. Jonghyun also notices that he’s gone brunette, he wishes he hadn’t though because he doesn't want to think about how attractive the other looks with dark hair (nor how Jonghyun keeps telling himself that the other looks amazing regardless.)

Jonghyun lets him take whatever time he needed to decide on the next overly sugary drink he wanted to end his life prematurely with, deciding that whatever had ripped the younger boy away from him the past couple of weeks and had seemingly caused him to look like stress personified could wait to be discussed later.

Don’t judge him, Jonghyun was a worrywart by nature.

Minhyun sighed, Jonghyun raised his eyebrows in surprise - that was a first, and in a voice that attempted to combat his current physical state said, “Strawberry shake, please. And…” he let the word drawl as he took a quick glance at the display cases, his face falling when he didn’t see his beloved strawberry cake. Jonghyun tried to fight a smile off his face (note: he lost).

“I haven’t put out the strawberry cake, so we still have a lot in the back.” He reassures the other. He leaves out the bit that he refused to put out the cake since it reminded him a little too much of the other and how Aron endlessly teased him that he sounded like a teenager who had just gotten his heartbroken for the first time. When the other looks up at him, and for the first time in weeks, Jonghyun feels oddly relieved seeing the grin on his face. Crescent moons and all.

“Haven’t seen you in a while.” Jonghyun tries to strike up a conversation while Minhyun perches himself on the stool behind the counter to watch as Jonghyun throws in the freshly cut strawberries and ice cream into the blender. The younger of the two didn’t reply for a while, which was another thing Jonghyun annoyingly observed to be a peculiar moment. Minhyun, from the moment Jonghyun met him until the day he disappeared a few weeks back, had been anything short of quiet or closed off. If anything, Jonghyun would place him at the number one spot for most talkative oversharers he knew, so the silence that engulfed the two of them - felt suffocating.

“Yeah. It’s been a while, huh?” is the other’s short reply.

Jonghyun frowns but drops the subject as he hands over the beverage and the jingle of the door charm signals another customer. “I’ll be right with you.” He calls out before heading to the back to get Minhyun his slice of cake.

Near closing time, which was 9 pm on weekends, the cafe was deserted of customers save for one individual. A lone figure, with messy brown hair, slumped in his chair while staring out the window. From the moment he stepped into the cafe, he hadn’t bothered Jonghyun as he used to, talking loudly so that Jonghyun could hear him from across the room nor singing along to the classics that he knew. He just sat there, in his own little world.

When Jonghyun set out with his broom to clean the floor of any trash or crumbs customers tended to drop, Minhyun still stayed in the same spot, the same position, looking at the same spot across the street. Jonghyun was able to broom, clean the tables, and stack half of the chairs on one side of the room without the younger even moving a muscle. Jonghyun was all for silence and being able to have some alone time, but the odd behavior of the once eccentric person he knew, bothered him. Granted, Minhyun, was an oddity in himself but watching him stare out the window and burn gazes into the people walking by was strange on a completely different level.

Deciding that the silence was stifling enough, the older male brought out a turkey sandwich and a cup of hot chocolate (one of Minhyun’s favorites) and walked over to the younger man. Placing the meal in front of him and pulling out the chair across from him undid the frozen spell Minhyun appeared to have been under. He looked at Jonghyun, caught off guard, his eye bags protruding heavily, and his eyes drained of the normal cheerfulness Jonghyun had grown accustomed to.

“Uh,” Minhyun blinked and looked down at the plate in front of him, he glanced back at Jonghyun, hesitation written across his face.

“You haven’t eaten all day,” Jonghyun reprimanded him lightly, “and it’s on the house so don’t worry if you’re too broke to afford it.” he cringed at the awkward joke he cracked but instantly relaxed when he saw a trace of humor flicker across the younger’s expression.

Minhyun thanked him, biting into the sandwich, relishing in the taste. Jonghyun wasn’t terrible at making sandwiches but he had never seen anyone eat one so deliciously. He wondered when the last time was that the younger male ate an actual meal and not just sugar mixed with sugar, his heart clenched at the thought. He pushed it away and opted to stare out into the dark streets, the only light coming from inside the cafe and the convenience store across the street, despite it being a Saturday there was barely anyone walking outside tonight. They sat without speaking for a while and allowed two Elvis songs to play through the jukebox’s speakers.

“Have you ever felt like your whole world was falling apart?” Minhyun, the first to break the silence, has his head rested on his palm and is absentmindedly stirring the hot chocolate in his mug with the spoon Jonghyun had brought out for him.

“What do you mean?” Minhyun’s behavior is really starting to freak Jonghyun out and he grew even more worried about what had pulled the other away from him for three weeks. He’ll deny it later but right now he wanted to pull Minhyun into his arms and whisper to him that whatever was happening was going to turn out fine. That he would do okay, that Jonghyun would make sure of it.

“Don’t know, just...” Jonghyun grabs for his hands instead, they feel cold and Jonghyun feels them shake in his.

“Is there something wrong?” Jonghyun reaches over to comb through Minhyun’s messy hair, his brain flashing every warning sign for him to stop.

“Yeah, my whole world is falling apart.”

Jonghyun and Minhyun never speak about that night again, that night was left out of every conversation they shared at the coffee shop and was never mentioned to either of their friends. It was kept as such a secret that Jonghyun isn’t entirely sure it ever happened. He replayed it in his head, however. Over and over till he drove himself crazy sometimes because as much as he hated it, he wanted to know more about Minhyun. Beyond their routine interactions at the cafe and small talks as they headed home together. As much as it drove him crazy, Jonghyun wanted to learn everything he could about the boy. From his hobbies, all the way down to his dream jobs. He had become so intrigued with him after that night, that any time Minhyun came into the cafe, Jonghyun’s attention was focused solely on him and it had become so apparent that Aron had started teasing him about it behind Minhyun’s back. It wasn’t right, these obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors? It wasn’t him. All these feelings and emotions, and the way his stomach felt like it was on a rollercoaster 24/7. He must be getting sick, that’s the only explanation. It’s the only thing that makes any kind of sense.

“You like him,” Aron insists on being unhelpful and downright annoying.

Jonghyun rolls his eyes and goes back to cutting fruit, they have about thirty minutes till opening, and though it's Sunday and the cafe never usually gets packed on Sundays, Jonghyun likes staying ahead of schedule. But it was a surprise Aron was here, it was a surprise he was actually awake before 10 on Sunday. Strange, really, Jonghyun didn’t like it one bit.

“You care about him,” Aron’s sitting next to him on the step stool he brought in from the alley. It’s old and rickety, and a bit rusted, and overall, pretty disgusting in Jonghyun’s book. But Jonghyun doesn’t mind it all that much. It keeps his co-worker off his clean counters at least. “Jonghyun, bro, just listen to me alright?”

“Come on, pay attention to me.”

“Are you paying attention to me?”

“Look at me.”

“That’s it, lemme see them cute eyes of yours.” Aron starts making kissy faces and Jonghyun actually smacks him with the sanitizing cloth. He feels joy from seeing Aron sputter from the bucket water.

“GROSS! Bro NOT cool, come on!”

Jonghyun can’t stop laughing, he doubles over and it’s the happiest he’s felt in a really long time. Aron waves it away, “Alright, yeah yeah. You had your fun, uh-huh yeah yeah. Can I talk now?”

“Yeah-” wheeze, “Go-”, wheeze, “Ahead.”

“You like Minhyun.”

Jonghyun quiets down immediately, he deadpans, “No, I don’t.”

“You do. And before you say anything else, Mingi invited us to his and Minhyun’s production of Everybody’s Talking About Jamie. And I also may have suggested a dinner for us four plus Dongho. So, kind of like a double date.” Aron’s facial expression turns into a look of fear as Jonghyun turns towards him, cutting knife in hand.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“It’s a classic, Jonghyun. You are so uncultured. As a matter of fact, I would even say it’s a must-see for any LGBTQ+ soul.” Aron’s dancing around the latter part of his statement and Jonghyun knows him a little too well.

“Don’t play dumb with me.”

“Oh, Jonghyun, but it is-”

“Do you like your job?”

“I’m sorry?”

“You heard me.” Jonghyun’s rinsing and cleaning the cutting knife before placing it in its designated spot in the kitchen. But the serious look on his face gives the shuddering feeling that he’s cleaning it of any fruit juice so as not to infect Aron once he stabs him. What a considerate guy, “I said, do you like your job? Do you wish to keep your job?”

Aron’s jaw drops, “That’s not right, Jonghyun, and you know that.” he points an accusatory finger at him, “I’ll report you to the union!”

“I am the union, now repeat what you said.”

“I set you up on a double date with Minhyun! Okay?! And I also invited Dongho because I don’t want to feel awkward. Oh, look at the time!” Aron hurries to the backroom to retrieve Jonghyun’s keys to unlock the front door. What a brat, Jonghyun thinks.

For the next week, Minhyun came to the shop later than usual which was usually within the hour before closing. Jonghyun would have everything stocked and cleaned save for Minhyun’s usual table by the window and waited for his last customer every night. It was pathetic, Jonghyun knew that, but he didn’t stop looking forward to it every time. On most nights, however, there’s something odd about Minhyun. Nothing ever too serious or too obvious, and really, he only noticed because Jonghyun really notices just about everything. Like the one time, Dongho had come early from a date. It was mid-December and so he wore a green parka that went down to his knees. The moment he walked through the front door, Jonghyun took one look at him and said, “You ripped your pants?”

Dongho spun around to look at him, “How did you know that?”

Jonghyun shrugged and held up his fingers to count every little thing he found suspicious. Dongho didn’t want to hear anything else come out of Jonghyun and locked himself in his room the whole night. Poor guy, Jonghyun remembers saying to himself. That was embarrassing for his roommate, for sure. So, naturally, it was brought on the rare occasion they had dinner together. Additionally, he’s a boss and he likes the ordinary. Anything gets too out of place and Jonghyun’s the first one to want to go and fix it. And Aron. Well, Aron, having been loyal to his image and character, has tried him more than anyone he’s ever known. Some days he has to be smarter to be able to thwart him whenever he’s got a trick up his sleeve. One time, Aron was supposed to open the shop because Jonghyun had a dentist’s appointment in the morning. He came back two hours after he was supposed to, to find Aron standing at the counter fuming.

“You ruined the PRANK, Jonghyun.” Aron’s arms were crossed over his chest.

“Ah, sorry, had to pick up a prescription to prevent infection in my molars.” Jonghyun looks at him innocently, he’s good at that. “Is there something you needed?”

Aron shakes his head and goes to the back room. He eats when he’s upset. Jonghyun chuckles at the thought, he knew what Aron had planned. He always does.

So, when Minhyun came in after rehearsals a couple of days before the performance, looking exhausted, his hair in disarray - Jonghyun was already warming up some hot cocoa. When Minhyun gets to the counter and starts pulling out his wallet, Jonghyun quips “Don’t worry about that.”

Minhyun looks startled.

“It’s on the house.” Jonghyun looks at Minhyun and lets a smile rest on his lips. His eyes trail down his face and he squints at a small smudge at the corner of his chin. “Were you wearing lipstick?”

Minhyun’s face turns red and he hastily reaches for the stash of napkins Jonghyun keeps behind the register. “Sorry, I um yeah. The play’s about a drag queen, kind of. Um, in a way.”

Jonghyun finds it cute, the stuttering, and the flushed face was a very endearing look on Minhyun. He hands Minhyun his cup of cocoa, “Hey, don’t worry about it. I think that’s really cool.

By the way, are you hungry? Aron was in the mood for crepes, so we made some before he left. I can put Nutella in them or strawberries with cream?”

Minhyun smiled, this one reaches his eyes “Yeah, that actually sounds really good. Thank you.”

Jonghyun waves him towards his usual table. When he brings the food to Minhyun, the other’s already dozing off into space. Poor thing, Jonghyun’s heart aches to see him like that. He shakes him gently, Minhyun jolts and smiles sheepishly, “Sorry.”

Jonghyun shakes his head and stares out into the street. It’s a Wednesday night, mid-August and everyone who works around them has either gone home or were working overtime in their offices. It was usually quiet during this time and Jonghyun loves looking at how still everything looks. How peaceful it is. It’s calming.

“Long day of practice?” He breaks the silence after he lets I want you back finish (a classic, he smiles proudly) and looks back at Minhyun. He catches him off guard during mid-chew and giggles, “My bad.”

Minhyun washes down the crepe with cocoa, “There’s one part we’ve always had trouble perfecting and even now, with the performance being only three days away. I’m still freezing up in the middle of it.” He stares down at his crepe, Jonghyun can see his pretty lips tremble a bit. He doesn’t have enough time to react before he has a full-grown college student crying in the middle of his coffee shop. Again.

Jonghyun doesn’t know what to do except console the taller of the two, he pats his head awkwardly and shushes him. It’ll be okay, he wants to tell him, just smile at them. Your smile is beautiful, and it will win them over.

But he knows that’s not very helpful right now.

The Friday night before the big day is a bit more unexpected, Jonghyun decided Minhyun needed a strawberry milkshake to go with his breakfast croissant sandwich. Aron had brought it upon himself to cook extra food, knowing that the college boy would be there later and very likely starving. Minhyun accepts the food graciously, chowing it down as if he hadn’t eaten in ages. A calm and welcomed silence falls between the two of them as Jonghyun has quite a bit of dishes to do after the short rush he had just before close. And Minhyun was obviously physically, mentally, and possibly even emotionally tired from his practice tonight.

“How’s your day been, Jonghyun?” Minhyun’s sipping his milkshake and peering at Jonghyun watching his every move.

“It was the same as always,” Jonghyun replies, moving the now polished glasses to their original spots behind the counter.

“Boring?” Minhyun quips, giggling a bit.

Jonghyun nods and says seriously, “Those are the best kind.”

Minhyun throws his head back and lets out a loud laugh, had the café been open, and with patrons sitting around trying to enjoy their cup of coffee and the café's usage of free wifi – Jonghyun would’ve scolded him and told him to quiet down. But seeing as they were closed and Minhyun was the only patron in the entire restaurant, with the only silence being the jukebox and themselves. Jonghyun decided he could let him slide. Just this once, “Aron told me you were the most boring person in the world.” Minhyun lets out between chuckles.

“I am.”

Minhyun laughs out loud again, his hands clap as if Jonghyun were a stand-up comedian who just gave his set. Minhyun recovers, leans over the counter, and says seriously “A 25-year-old whose favorite artist is Frank Sinatra and refuses to listen to any songs born during his lifetime?” Minhyun shakes his head and climbs over Jonghyun’s counter to sit on it. The barista resists the urge to tell him to get the fuck off because that’s unsanitary and if the health inspector came in, Jonghyun’s cafe would fail pathetically. But he doesn’t and instead he feels himself walk closer to Minhyun, he really likes his newly dyed hair. Black, Jonghyun’s favorite color.

Oh my god, hair? That’s what I care about now? Minhyun’s HAIR? Jonghyun’s going through a crisis when Minhyun grabs his hand and brings it up to rest against his cheek, Jonghyun can feel his fingertips lightly brush against Minhyun’s soft locks. Oh my god, hair again.

“Jonghyun, you went to culinary school. That in itself, is the single most impressive thing in the world.” Minhyun’s looking at him with admiration? Is that what you call it? Adoration? What’s another nice word that starts with a....appreciation?

“Alright, Jonghyun, shut up already.” He whispers.

“Huh?” Minhyun looks at him, confused.

“Um, nothing.” Jonghyun is sweating again, he can feel it in his back. “I, um, have to close the shop now. It’s, um, late, Minhyun.”

Minhyun hums, “You said my name.” He chuckles, stupid cute face. Oh my god shut UP, Jonghyun.

“Yeah, yeah don’t flatter yourself, Mingyu.” Jonghyun grabs his bag and makes sure he has his key before looking back at Minhyun, eyes pointed, “Do you plan to get off my formerly sanitized counter, roommate of my friend’s friend?”

“Ah, there it is. I knew you were being too nice.” Minhyun laughs and jumps off, brushing away pretend crumbs that may have fallen out of his pockets? Jonghyun shakes his head and shudders, he makes a mental note to re-sanitize everything in the morning.

“Come on, loser, I’ll take you home.” Jonghyun begins walking away, keys jingling in hand, humming to a song. He hears Minhyun run up behind him and smack his hand against his forehead.

“Do you have a fever? Are you okay?” Minhyun looks at him, cute eyes narrowed. Jonghyun ignores his heartbeat increasing and his sweating intensifies. Sheesh, did he forget to turn off the heater?

As much as Jonghyun would love to continue feeling Minhyun’s soft hands on him, he actually did need to go home, and he couldn’t have Minhyun out too late without his little twerp of a roommate getting suspicious.

“I’m fine, this is your last chance for a ride, or you can walk home by yourself.” He can hear Minhyun giggle behind him and his tummy feels queasy. Must’ve been the meatball sub, Aron had bought him for lunch. He would have to give his coworker a lesson the next time he saw him. Ensuring the doors were locked and unlocking the car for Minhyun, Jonghyun felt his heartbeat speed up and his stomach doing backflips in his belly. Yup, food poisoning, for sure.

The night of the performance comes earlier than he expects, and Aron’s already taken it upon himself to tell all their usuals that they’ll be closing earlier on the weekend. He’s even printed out signs to put on the front doors so as not to have any surprises. Jonghyun finds it annoying that only when he wants to be, he can be extremely useful.

“You got everything?” Aron asks him while also rushing him and Dongho out of the door.

Jonghyun holds the bouquet of flowers he had bought for both Minhyun and Mingi (although Aron likes to be annoying and claims it’s for the former only) to congratulate them on their performance. He’s quite a sweetheart like that or at least that’s what Dongho means when he says he’s a “softie”.

“Yeah. Yeah. Can you hurry?” Jonghyun snaps.

Aron raises his hands, “Alright, okay, I’m done.”

He looks at Dongho and shakes his head, “Can you believe this guy?”

Dongho laughs, “Can you blame him? He’s in love.”

Jonghyun rolls his eyes at both of them and walks in the direction of the art institute without them. He can snap at Aron because Aron usually just ignores him and does whatever he wants. But he can never get upset with Dongho, especially not after the last time he snapped at him for using all the towels without telling Jonghyun that they needed to do laundry. His roommate didn’t speak to him for two weeks. He’s sensitive, he gets a pass. Aron? Aron can deep clean the café for the next month.

By the time, the trio had arrived at the institute’s auditorium, most of the seats had already been filled up. Seeing this surprised Jonghyun, he didn’t know university plays had fans or an audience really. He just figured it would be the friends and family of the performers. The last time Jonghyun went to anything akin to a performance like this it was to his own kindergarten Christmas recital. He was the narrator for his school’s production of the Night before Christmas and was amazing at it, thank you very much.

But this..this was a new level of strange that Jonghyun didn’t expect. There were college students, middle-aged people, older folks, couples, singles, trios like himself, Dongho, and Aron. The hum of everyone whispering to each other at once was intense and it honestly brought a little bit of anxiety to Jonghyun. No wonder Minhyun was so stressed the past couple of days, anybody would be in front of so many people. Jonghyun admitted to a newfound respect for the guy. This was incredible.

“What’s on your mind, boss? You’re too quiet and it’s scaring me.” Aron’s leaning over Dongho, looking expectantly at Jonghyun, eyes wide and nose in Jonghyun’s space.

“This is really nice,” Jonghyun replies, still looking around. His legs are shaking, and he can’t keep his palms from sweating no matter how many times he wipes them off his jeans. The play starts and the moment Minhyun’s character steps on stage, Jonghyun can hear his heart in his ears. And as cliché, as it sounds, Minhyun’s presence engulfed Jonghyun’s entire being and he saw no one else but the beautiful angel on stage.

Aron was wrong, Jonghyun’s feelings have gone past infatuation. Actually, he’s known it for a while now. He knows how he looks at Minhyun is filled with desire, fondness, and as much as he hates to admit it, he knows he looks a wee bit charmed by the college student. He notices when his heart skips a beat when Minhyun starts talking, notices the way his hands get sweaty and clammy whenever Minhyun stares intently at him as he listens to Jonghyun’s every word. He knows how his stomach does flips and tricks whenever Minhyun is standing too close to him. He’s known that for a while and no matter how hard he tries to deny it, it doesn’t keep it from being true. He knows this, he knows all of it. But seeing Minhyun on stage in his element, performing for hundreds of people, singing, and dancing. It made him even more beautiful, Jonghyun didn’t know that was possible.

After dinner, Aron somehow managed to get the rest of the group to ditch Jonghyun and Minhyun. The barista doesn’t know how but one moment they were walking out of the Italian restaurant they had dinner and were walking towards the café for an even later night celebration. And the next moment, he was only accompanied by Minhyun. The entire night, Jonghyun couldn’t get him alone to have a conversation, especially with the huge commotion Mingi and Aron brought wherever they went. And with Minhyun and Mingi answering every question and fascination Jonghyun’s friends had about their play. Jonghyun wanted to congratulate Minhyun, he wanted to spend some time alone with him without the rest of his friends eavesdropping on everything. He looks over at the taller male who’s dressed in a long sleeve and dark washed jeans. Jonghyun decides he looks the most beautiful he’s ever seen him in, his black locks blowing around in the wind.

“I think you were amazing, tonight,” Jonghyun tells him, it’s true, Minhyun was talented and tonight was proof.

Minhyun smiles at him, it seems forced. “Thanks.” he’s clutching the flowers to his chest. Minhyun looks away from Jonghyun and they don’t speak for the remainder of their walk towards his café.

Minhyun is quiet for the most part, obviously, something had been bothering him since they left the restaurant. Jonghyun doesn’t want to force anything out of him, decides that if Minhyun is comfortable - he’ll tell him. In his own time and in his own way.

Minhyun releases a shaky sigh, he looks at Jonghyun, his eyes are brimmed red. “You know, this play was really difficult for me to do.”

Jonghyun raised his eyebrows, “Really?”

Minhyun nods, “But you were so good tonight. Amazing really. The whole thing was..” Jonghyun wanted to say beautiful but Minhyun doesn’t look like he wants to hear it.  
Minhyun stares at his hands clasped together on the table, “I relate more to Jamie than you can even imagine. The struggles he went through. The hate he faced. I lived through that.”

Jonghyun nods, he doesn’t know where Minhyun’s going with this but he wanted him to know that he understands. Because he does, and it is probably why he fell for the play as much as he did. It was his life on stage. It was sad but beautiful. It was also that there are kids who still go through it today, but beautiful that they can at least express through other outlets that allow his community to shine.

“That’s what threw me out of my parents’ house.”

“Me too.”

Jonghyun looks at him, he bites his lip to keep the tears from falling. Minhyun looks back, his eyes glazing over, “Mingi’s a really good friend-“his voice breaks. “He, um, he’s just always been there for me you know.”

Minhyun’s voice is trembling and Jonghyun’s trying not to make him feel uncomfortable by staring, he clasps his hands together, to keep himself from shaking. Because he knows, he understands. Getting kicked out and ostracized by your parents is never easy, especially if the reason is their inability to accept the people their children love. It hurts, Jonghyun understands, it’s always going to hurt. It never stops hurting, but eventually, you get used to it. You get used to feeling alone and eventually the pain dulls over time. It dulls to the point you get to live your own life. It took Jonghyun years to figure that one out, it took him applying and going to culinary school, it took restaurant after restaurant as a line cook, and sometimes, as a sous chef - to finally realize that he didn’t love it as much as he thought it did. Sure, he liked to cook, and he liked the intensity of being at a restaurant because restaurants - as strange and out of the ordinary as they are - Jonghyun thrived off of them. Being the only level headed individual in a sea of lunatics made Jonghyun useful, it made him feel needed. Jonghyun loved it and it let him get his mind off of everything else that spiraled out of control in his life. The pain he was feeling, the pressure from school, and the stresses from everyday adult life. It kept him sane for so many years. Until eventually he found the one thing he was passionate about. Despite the late hours he had to spend while closing at the restaurants he worked at and despite his overwhelming stress from school, Jonghyun always found solace in coffee shops. He’d chat it up with the baristas there and that’s how he met Aron who used to really only clean up after everybody else, but always showed interest to learn more.

Jonghyun took him under his wing and taught him everything he knew. He’d bring him to his shared apartment with his friend and roommate, Dongho. They’d spend hours bonding over pasta dishes and fighting over whoever made the tastiest one. It was hard but Jonghyun realized that even without his parents, he could still make it on his own. He didn’t need to impress them if they weren’t going to love him for the person that he was. He found a family, all on his own. And for the longest time that’s all he needed, the same people, the same job, the same cafe that played all the same songs, and he was fine with that. For so many years, he was fine just living and being content. It was the same thing every day and it was fine.

There was nothing to have to take risks about, nothing to be spontaneous about. Risks bring change and spontaneity brings the unexpected, and those two when combined bring heartbreak. But seeing Minhyun that first time at his cafe, that was unexpected. And then Minhyun staying afterward, the entire day with Mingi, brought a change. And Minhyun expecting Jonghyun to do something out of the ordinary was spontaneous. And Jonghyun falling for Minhyun was a risk, a risk he unknowingly took.

But as he sits there with Minhyun, he realizes he loves this change. He loves Minhyun’s unpredictable antics. He wants to take the risk of being with Minhyun and for once in his life he’s not scared of the consequences. He’s not worried or bothered that this will ruin everything he has ever created to complete his little dull life. He wants this, he needs this. He’s gonna drive himself crazy if he doesn’t at least try to make it happen.

He smiles at him, tears building up at the corners of his eyes, he looks at Minhyun, and says “I want to be with you.”

Minhyun stares back, eyes shining, a smile threatening to show. He looks relieved.

“I want to make you happy.” Jonghyun continues, “I want to make you laugh, and I want to make you feel like the most important person in the world. Because you are.

My entire life I thought I wouldn’t amount to anything. I thought I couldn’t do anything. I thought I was incapable of loving someone and I thought I was incapable of being loved.” Minhyun’s tears are falling and his hands reach for Jonghyun’s.

Jonghyun looks at him and the Four Seasons are blasting through his head right now, of course in Aron’s terrible rendition. But it doesn’t matter, his beaming smile never fades from his face. He had one of those smiles, the kind that looked like a laugh because his whole body responded in joy and the energy that surrounded him was pure happiness. Needless to say, it was adorable.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi again...hope you liked it....you can find me on my [ social ](https://twitter.com/twohyundelights) and um, you can scream about nuest's new comeback with me... :)
> 
> Let me know if you liked this and thank you for reading!


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